Irritating use of the 1st Person Plural
Please, I beg you to consider your careless disregard of the rules of polite grammar. In a normal conversation when sharing one’s views, go easy on the 1st person plural. Use the 1st person singular, keep it personal; don’t involve me in moral quandaries until you invite me in. Then you can throw around the plural with permission. Let me explain:
When someone has clearly been thinking a lot about some moral/social concerns in society / church / charity of their own interest they often come off with the following line :
“I think we need to do more about……we don’t do enough about ….”
Whoa – hold on… “WE”? Since when do I have to suddenly share the burden of this concern? – you’ve been telling me what you’ve been thinking about – I’ve barely had time to process the ills you intend to fix so don’t slip me into the moral compulsion by your careless dropping of the 1st person plural! And what if I am already doing something about what you are discussing? You are forcing me into an attempt to justify myself by proudly listing my personal involvement in said cause. I did not want to have to do that.
I’m happy if you say “I think ‘I’ need to do more about….” then I have the space to consider the issue without being rushed into plunging my precious time / money / ideological future into the idea you have recently considered for YOURSELF. At least if you want me to think about joining your cause have the decency to ask “What do you think?” – that’s a gentler way of inviting me in to share the morally compulsive action you suggest.
Honestly, some people think morals are more than just personal!
Vox O’Malley – needlessly irritated by trivia
shameless… but.. maybe WE should give more money to charity…
http://qmonkey.wordpress.com/2007/10/16/the-gumpy-miser-in-me/
as i say.. shameless plug of my own story, which someone told me was funny, so i’m trying to up the hit count before it dissapears into the anals
We all agree with Vox but its lonely out there trying to fix the world all by yourself: QMonkey won’t even helo the Colonel…
The first person plural becomes even more annoying when your once single, feminist, intelligent friend becomes a ‘we’ person; having met a new boyfriend: we loved the concert, we adored this restaurant, we chose this sappy ‘From the both of Us’ card together in our favourite card shop, in our favourite shopping centre, in our favourite town. Soon I will marry him and give up my right to independant though and my own surname…
Ok- my single angst outta the way for a Saturday night I can now go be third wheel at dinner.
You and Lily should come for dinner at Grace Neills then I could be angst- ridden about you x
i think “we” need to calm down
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Fortunately, 1st person plural doesn’t necessarily includes the addressee in English language. Some non-European languages distinguishes inclusive from exclusive 1st person plural.
Oops… include(s) and distinguish(es).
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